Chapter Thirty-Three

We moved quickly down a long hallway, then turned left. I passed three doors before I came to the one I was looking for. A name was clearly emblazoned on the door: Commander T. Bergren. I touched the palm pad with another code I knew by heart, stepped in, locking the door as Sully followed. An unexpected sense of relief washed over me. For the first time since we'd left the Karn, I felt safe.

The outer office was dimly lit. There was a long desk to the left and three chairs on the right. Everything was tidied for the night: neat, orderly, deskscreen dark. No sharp-eyed assistant to ask questions. No fellow officers dropping by for a chat who just might recognize Thad's little sister Chaz. And ask more questions. Our timing was almost too good.

Straight ahead were the wide double doors to Thad's inner office. My code opened those as well.

Sully said nothing, sent nothing that I was aware of. I knew he had to be telling Ren where we were. He had to be formulating plans. It shouldn't take any more than ten, fifteen minutes to encode and send the data Sully had taken from the labs.

The illuminated display cabinet on Thad's back wall cast a wide shaft of light across the carpet. The cabinet was crowded with Fleet plaques, award statues, mementos. I headed past it, past the elegant dark blue couch and plush chairs to my right, past the round conference table and hologrid on my left.

I slid into Thad's high backed chair and half swiveled it around. I tabbed up the deskscreen. The light over the desk automatically came on.

Sully handed the datatabs to me.

"Everything goes?" My voice was calm, flat. Captain Bergren in command.

He nodded, saying nothing, sending nothing. Like another time I remembered. Stay out of my goddamned mind, I'd said. He had. He was.

I slotted in the thin tabs and tried to ignore the small tendrils of pain and fear weaving around my heart. Instead, I concentrated on appending the data to a transit file. Then I realized I had no idea of the exact receipt address. "What's Drogue's-"

A series of numbers flashed through my mind, staying there as if it were my memory. Not his. So the link wasn't broken. Just silent, until I needed something.

I keyed in the address. "You want to add a message?" It would take at least five minutes for the three tabs to encode and append.

He nodded. I vacated the chair and headed for a low cabinet by the conference table, knowing it usually held spare power clips which would work in my Stinger. At least, it always had in the past. I might feel safer in my brother's office, but I knew it was at best temporary. We still had to get off station, out of Marker. Alive.

I put a fresh clip in my laser pistol, shoved another in my jacket pocket. Fleet didn't use Carvers but they did have a similar, high-power laser pistol. Thad had one clip that might work.

It will.

I turned from where I knelt in front of the cabinet. Was he reading resonances or my thoughts at random? I wasn't sure I wanted the latter.

It's safer if we keep contact.

Obviously true, when we'd infiltrated the jukor lab, when we were running from Berri and Lazlo. When answers, decisions, information had to be quickly shared.

But at the moment we sat in my brother's office behind two sets of locked doors. I wanted to listen to my own thoughts, to feel my own reactions. Without Sully's comments, and his pain, wearing at me.

Without him gathering information on me. While I'd never been permitted to gather any about him. Though now I knew why.

I handed him the spare clip. Anger slipped out before I could stop it. "You should have told me. Warned me."

"Ren agrees with you. If it's any consolation."

"Did you think I wouldn't notice?"

"I hoped, given enough time, it wouldn't matter." His voice was soft.

"Lies are lies, whether they're said now, or ten years from now."

The computer beeped softly in the silence, segueing data into transmittable code.

"I never lied," he said finally.

That was true, only because he'd never permitted questions. I turned away, hugged my arms over my chest and went to stare at Thad's trophies. I tamped down my anger. But the pain, and the fear, refused to go away.

Why were all the handsome ones always such lying bastards?

The click and tap behind me told me Sully worked on his message. Not through a vidlink-too easily intercepted. What Drogue would receive would topple lives. Powerful lives.

Then maybe no more jukors would breed. And no more Takas would die.

And maybe Chaz Bergren would find herself a stellar helm somewhere, on a freighter that worked the rim, whose owner asked few questions and cared less about documentation. There'd be the peace of jumpspace again. And the ever-present game of hide and seek with rim pirates. Like Sullivan. Pirate. Poet. Smuggler. Mercenary. Monk. Shape-shifter.

I broke the silence with a question. If he didn't want to answer, fine. But no one was going to stop me from asking them anymore. "Does Drogue know about the hijackings, the raids you've pulled over the years?"

Sully took his fingers from the keypads. "He's knows about the results. In a way, it was his idea."

"Drogue?"

"It was the Englarians who showed me how little the Empire did for those who weren't in their favor. Takas. Stolorths. A variety of colonies on the rim, where people routinely died of diseases cured a hundred years ago. It felt wrong for me to wear the robe, knowing what I am. But it wasn't wrong to continue to help the forgotten, the outcasts. Clinics and orphanages need funds to survive."

Ren had said the reasons behind Sully's piracy would surprise me. In spite of my anger at Sully's deception, he was right.

"Your family's money couldn't have accomplished the same goals, legally?"

"I had no reason to think my father would be charitable."

The deskscreen flashed. Data encoded and ready to transmit.

"Will you go back to doing that, when this is finished?"

"When this is finished, Hayden won't be in control of the Sullivan moneys. I may not be the preferred heir, but I am the legal one."

I leaned against the cabinet as the ramifications sunk in. This was more than Takas and jukors. This was a wealth of almost unimaginable proportions. Gabriel Ross Sullivan would shortly become a very sought after, very influential man.

Unless those seeking his influence learned he was a Ragkiril, a shape-shifter. That was more than sufficient reason to hide behind lies. To have a Stolorth friend to take the blame, or credit, for what he did. Or maybe it wasn't just friendship. Maybe Ren saw the numbers, too.

He tapped the deskscreen, sent the data. "You may have good reason to be angry with me, but you've no right to dishonor Ren."

I straightened abruptly at his retort to my unspoken comments. "Damn you! Stop-"

Sully lunged to his feet, his hand grasping under his jacket for his laser pistol. Fear clamped my heart. For a few tense seconds I thought I'd finally pushed him too far. Then the wide double doors on my right slid sideways. I swiveled, grabbed my Stinger.

"What in hell are you-?" Commander Thaddeus Bergren took a half step into his office and stared at the man standing behind his desk. "Sullivan? You're dead."

I lowered my laser pistol. "Hello, Thad."

He jerked his head toward me, his pale blue eyes widening. "My God. Chaz!"

"Sit down." I motioned toward the conference table and four chairs. And shot a glance at Sully who still had his Carver trained on my brother.

He lowered it. He's genuinely glad to see you.

I hoped so. We needed him. I reholstered my laser pistol as I took the chair next to Thad's. My brother was out of uniform, dressed casually, evidently not returning to his office on business. I recognized the light blue sweater he wore. It matched his eyes. I'd given it to him for his birthday two years before. "Listen to me. A firm called Crossley Burke is running a gen lab here on M-2. They're breeding jukors. We're not sure why-"

"I know."

A sick feeling grabbed my stomach. Thad knew. Was there nothing left of my life that wasn't twisted, full of lies? I looked at my perpetually virtuous older brother with disgust. "How could you get involved with that?"

He knotted his fingers together and stared at me for a moment. I was surprised by how much he resembled our father. Same angular face, pale eyes, sandy-red hair, now with glints of silver. But Lars's face had never showed the kind of turmoil on Thad's now.

"I got involved with that," he said quietly, "to keep you alive."

It took me a few heartbeats to process what he said. "Explain."

"I found out Burke was doing something with jukors. I began pulling manifests, incomings, thinking it was just some rich man's whim to increase his personal security force. Stupidly, I confronted him. He warned me that if I acted on it, you'd be the one to suffer. I didn't believe him. It sounded too implausible. Why would he take such a risk, just because he wanted some guard-beasts for his estates?"

Thad shook his head, as if remembering something unpleasant. "Next I know, you're up on murder charges. Dereliction of duty. I never connected Burke with what happened until I got into a lift and Burke was there, with a bodyguard. A bearded guy with a laser pistol. He stopped the lift, told me you'd get the death sentence. But if I kept quiet, he'd see to it you were sent to Moabar. I knew it was Hell there. But at least, you'd be alive. Maybe, in time, I could find a way to get you pardoned."

I don't remember breathing. I don't remember not breathing. I stared at him. "But you could've gone to the Admirals Council. Hell, you could've gone to Darius Tage, have him talk to Prew!" If there was a name synonymous in the Empire with unflinching honor and ethics, it was First Barrister Darius Tage.

"Burke owns people high up in the Empire. I don't know who they are. This project of his isn't about guard-beasts. It's much bigger, political. I have no proof, but my guess is he's looking to fund some kind of inter-quadrant war. I knew if I talked to the wrong person, Burke would come after you. Kill you."

I barely recognized my strong, always in control, authoritative brother. Hayden Burke had him by the one thing I never suspected mattered to Thad. Me.

My brother actually loved me. Pieces of my shattered life started to flow back together. "We need to get out of Marker. We took out the gen-lab on Level 28 an hour ago. We lost Burke's people in the core, but-"

"The fire alarm? That was you?"

"We used low-impact charges to destroy the lab."

"Not all of it." Sully sat on the desk. He picked up the datatabs. "That proof you didn't have might be in here. It's on its way to people in Dafir, and on Moabar Station, who can use it. They can't be bought out, or threatened. It may take time, but they will be believed."

Sully slipped the datatabs back into his jacket. "We need a ship, commander. The information is safe. We're not."

"I can get a maintenance tug to get you back to the terminal."

I shook my head. "Burke's people know about the ship that brought us here. They'll be watching for it, and us."

"You have any freighters heading out-system?" Sully asked.

"Not that I have immediate access to. Fleet ships are always going in and out, but I don't know who I can trust." Thad's mouth tightened into an angry line. Angry at the situation but probably angry at himself as well. 'I don't know' was never one of his favorite expressions.

"Except...." Thad threw me a hesitant glance. "The Morgan Loviti came in a few hours ago."

The name shot through me with a jolt. "Philip's here?"

"I'm meeting him for a drink in...." He pulled up his sleeve, uncovering his watch. "I'm late. Ten minutes ago. I stopped to pick up a new ship design I wanted to show him. Didn't know I'd find you." His gaze flicked to Sully then back to me.

Sully holstered his Carver. "What makes you think he'd help us?"

"The Guthries have considerable power, are well-respected. Philip Guthrie is one of the most ethical people I know. His family publicly denounced the jukor project twenty years ago. I have no reason to believe he's changed either his mind or his morals."

"You're willing to risk Chasidah's life on that?"

"You probably don't know she was married to him. He still cares for her, very much."

I touched Thad's arm. "We ran into Philip about a month ago, in Calth. He could've impounded the ship, sent me back to Moabar." I looked past him, at Sully. "He let us go."

"I'll meet him in the bar, talk to him."

"You can't guarantee what his intentions will be when he learns Chasidah's here. What we've done."

"Of course not, but-"

"I can. Bring him here."

Sully's unexpected offer surprised me.

My brother's eyes narrowed. "A man like Philip Guthrie doesn't respond well to questions at gun point, if that's your plan."

"If he's lying, if he's working for Burke, or if he has any intentions of returning Chasidah to Moabar, I'll know when I see him."

Thad frowned. "How-?"

Sully shoved himself off the desktop. "I'm a Ragkiril."

"Ridiculous. You're not a Stolorth. You're human."

Sully looked tired. "Ragkir mind talents exist in many species. Even humans."

"He can read Philip, scan him," I told Thad when my brother's startled blue gaze focused on me.

Thad rose slowly. "And if he is working with Burke?"

"Then I can make him forget he ever saw us."

A clear expression of distaste crossed Thad's features. But he made no comment. He stopped at the doorway to the outer office. "I'll be back in ten minutes."

Sully remained standing, quietly, after the doors closed behind my brother. I felt him link with Ren, saw the flash of thought-pictures. Not Berri or Lazlo, but there were people in the corridors, looking. Ren sensed their searching. But he had no visual link with Verno and couldn't provide detailed descriptions, other than male humans, discreetly armed.

I leaned my elbows on the table, resting my face in my hands. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. I wasn't sure of how I felt about Philip's involvement, but knew what Thad had said was true. Philip was ethical. To the point, perhaps, of being stodgy. His family had been vehement in their objections to the jukors bred during the war. And they'd never support an insurrection in the Empire, not one funded by Burke and carried out through the use of jukors.

The issue, of course, would be how he'd react to Sully. Pirate. Ghost. Ragkiril.

The chair next to me squeaked. Sully folded his hands on the tabletop.

I propped my chin on my fist. "He could refuse to help us on a matter of principle. Nothing to do with Burke."

"And miss the chance to play hero?"

I ignored his sarcasm and voiced a disturbing thought that had been hovering. One that touched on things Gregor had said. "Could you force him to help us?"

Sully took a deep breath. "If I say no, I'd be lying. If I tell you the truth, then I've added to your fears about me."

"If you can do things like that, why didn't you know Thad was coming into the office until he was at this door?"

"Strictly a priority error. I was focused on you. And keeping a light link with Ren. It's like picking a conversation out of a crowded room, but not being able to hear all of them."

I leaned back, nodded. "But you could force Philip to help us?"

"I could make him believe that's what he wanted to do. But if we ran into three, four of his officers who dissented, there'd be problems."

"I heard Gregor tell Aubry he saw a Ragkiril strip the minds of four prisoners during the war."

"A Ragkiril can't. A Kyi-Ragkiril could."

"Explain."

Sully hesitated only a moment, out of habit, perhaps. Or perhaps listening to Ren tell him it was time to start answering my questions. "A Kyi-Ragkiril is one whose true existence is in a dimension called the Kyi, who draws additional energies from that. Those energies can be used, manipulated, shifted. The Kyi's not that different from jumpspace. A neverwhen of sorts. You called it 'gray fuzzy soft' when you saw it."

Surprise jolted me. I'd not only seen it, I'd experienced it. When the Meritorious slammed through the cold jump; and when she exploded, and almost took the Karn with her. When Sully had healed Ren.

And when Sully made love to me.

"You're a Kyi-Ragkiril."

"Yes." No hesitation this time.

"But you said you can't-"

"I didn't say I couldn't. I said if I had to control a number of people, there'd be problems. I'd have to shift to my true form, like I did in the core."

Shape-shifter. So Kyi-Ragkirils were shape-shifters. "When Ren was hurt, on the bridge, you didn't... shift forms." Energy had rippled, sparkled. But he'd never shifted form.

There was a long, hard silence. His shoulders were stiff under his black jacket. "I did."

"I was right next to you." Touching you, holding you. "I would've seen...."

"I changed what you saw. I had to. It was wrong. But there was too much at risk."

Ren had been dying. The Karn, in shambles. The Meritorious almost totally destroyed. And Sully had been in my mind, just like in Trel's bar. But this time, not shielding the emotions I was sending. But altering what I saw, altering his own form. And I hadn't even known.

Part of me understood he had valid reasons for what he'd done. But another part of me, a part that was far too crowded with unwanted mental duro-hards, recoiled. Shocked. Angered. "You had no right!"

"None at all. I also had no choice."

"Next time, try honesty. It-"

Sully held his hand up, stopping my words. "Thad's back. With Guthrie."

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